Can I get it?

Either that I’ve been too long in this idleness or I finally come into the hard fact about my past desires, which never vanished or I just envious to see you busily dancing in my previous fantasy; but I started to have a deep sore feeling every time I look into your familiar routine. I thought I’ve forgotten how it feels, but dear, it is still there. Though I know that the chance to step into the same vehicle no longer exist, things have changed; but I still miss it, really miss it. Gotta find a way to wipe this sorrow off. And I guess, the only way to override this feeling is by having something greater than it ever was.

Now, I am down to the question, “Where can I get it?”