a Red Placebo Collar

Today i bought a new collar for Tata. A red collar, I think it's good for Tata as she's a girl, should get a more feminine accessories for her.
I also bought some raw cow hides for Tata's snack. It said will help to keep dog’s dental hygiene. Guess Tata would need it, she never brush her teeth ever.

The reason I bought the new collar is that last week she broke off her old collar; I guess she get bored being tied up for almost 2 weeks. So she broke free and run around temple. It’s not that we are cruel to her, but we just don't dare to let her go off leash as she would scratch herself wildly to anything – anywhere and making herself bleed again.

As I walk to cashier, I think about my reason to care so much for Tata.
Do I really like dogs? Do I really care for Tata? Do I do this out of compassion? or simple a placebo for my poor soul?

Placebo... maybe it is the reason
Maybe by being busy to take care sick Tata, I can feel good about myself
Maybe by feeding her, I can feed my empty soul
Maybe by playing with her, I can free my worries
Am I doing all these cause I feel sorry for myself?
Am I ???